​Sometimes we wait.
 
Lately, we wait for guidance on re-openings. We wait for stimulus checks. We wait for good news in the fight against illness. These days I cannot even enter the vet with the dog. I wait in my car until someone calls me on the phone and meets me at the door to take the animal inside without me. Then I’m back to the car to wait again until the dog is returned to the door.
 
Other times we wait our turn in a drive-through line that seems endless. We wait for a chance to advance six feet closer to the cashier. We wait for cleaning supplies to be made available. Recently, many of us waited to learn if toilet paper would ever be stocked on store shelves again.
 
There are those who wait for the food bank to be open again. Some wait for a diagnosis from the doctor’s office or delivery of prescriptions. Others wait for a simple break in the rain. The wait itself might be scary or frustrating, pushing us beyond our comfort zones.
 
Waiting is not my strongest asset. My ordinary reaction to waiting is annoyance. Waiting conjures notions of delay, postponements, setbacks. In a world of go, go, go, waiting seems wasteful. Or is it?
 
What if I view waiting as helpful time? What if, instead of delay, I focus on expectation? Instead of setbacks, I concentrate on anticipation? Could I pay attention to blessings and prayers rather than difficulties and complaining? What if waiting is meant to be hopeful?
 
“We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love be with us, Lord, even as we put our hope in you.” (Psalm 33:20-22, CEB)
 
The hymn writer has just praised God and taken a very close look at everything awesome about God. Now that God’s greatness is recognized, it is simply time to wait – wait for guidance, wait for salvation, wait for God’s Word. With a secure dependence, we find ourselves happy and ready to ask that God revitalize us with Love. We have confidence in God, and we get to relax knowing that God acts in our best interest.
 
Maybe I need to view waiting as a server in a restaurant. Waiting doesn’t have to mean sitting around until something happens. Sometimes it means serving, and serving most definitely means action.
 
Perhaps waiting on God is more like a pregnant mother. Just like expecting a baby, maybe my waiting is to be spent actively preparing for the fulfilment of a promise. In that way, I think waiting isn’t supposed to be frustrating or scary. Waiting is love in action.
 
If I show patience and strength in my waiting, completely trusting God in all things, I believe I will enter a place that is closer to Jesus than I ever imagined. When I accept that I can’t run this show but can only lean on God (God’s thinking and ways are not my thinking and ways, right?), that’s when things happen. God uses waiting to change us. Listening, pondering, serving, preparing… hmmm… if I do this well, I think waiting will be worth it.
 
Patiently waiting,
Pastor Beth

​When this whole virus thing started, we were hit with a new reality very quickly. One day we were in the church office and the preschool children were chattering away in the classrooms; the next day we were closing up shop and staying home. At that time, our expectation was that we would be separated for a couple of weeks.
 
At first, things felt chaotic to me. I was trying to work from home, but everything I needed was at the church. Then came the anger that this was going to take a month rather than two weeks. Next was the acceptance and resolution to figure this out and make it work. I began to find creative ways to manage the daily binds and actually began to enjoy the challenge. I found myself getting more done that ever before, and I felt good accomplishing much.
 
Most of all, I enjoyed the moments I was able to slow down. Walking the dog, biking the neighborhood, watching the bird feeders, working in the yard, sleeping through the night, looking at stars… these are things that had been missing. Even though the work was demanding, I was finding a balance of rest and family time. My prayer life was healthy; my devotional time uninterrupted. I felt I was doing what God had asked of me, and – even in the midst of a pandemic – I was working hard to stay faithful to God’s call.
 
Now, more than two months later, we are still apart with no true end in sight, and I’m sliding back into old realities. I spend more time at my computer than I do with everything else combined. I don’t always eat with the family. My calendar is filled to the brim with Internet meetings and gatherings. My bike is accumulating a layer of dust (to be fair, it’s probably pollen), and my bird feeders need filling. My days are busy, busy, busy, and I often find myself working into the late hours of the night (or early hours of the morning).  All went well for a time, but I’m falling back into my old ways and the balance is slipping.
 
One day, when the two were chatting, God reminded Moses of how the Israelites were brought out of Egypt and how important God’s people are to God’s heart. “If you faithfully obey me and stay true to my covenant, you will be my most precious possession out of all the peoples, since the whole earth belongs to me.” (Exodus 19, CEB) When Moses came down and told the people all that God had said, they were excited and responded with complete commitment: “Everything that the Lord has said we will do.”
 
Reading Exodus is not something I’ve done only once or twice. I know the stories. I know that this nineteenth chapter is about the people of God arriving at Mt. Sinai where they will receive the commandments that stand to this day. This place brings them to the realization of who they are as God’s people. Rescued from slavery in Egypt, protected from plagues and pandemics, saved from starvation in the desert – these are the ones who are God’s most precious out of everything the world has to offer.
 
I also know that the Israelite children are constantly committing to God and then constantly messing things up. This most recent promise of theirs won’t be the final word on following God. They will feel displaced at first, maybe even a bit chaotic. This will be a different kind of being, and they will be learning to live into a new normal, socially distanced from the enemy. Then, they will learn to embrace their existence and step up as empowered and hopeful people, creatively working to live in God’s will in healthy and balanced ways… until they get comfortable. At that point, slip ups will happen. Bad decisions will be made. Sin will be busy, busy, busy. All will go well with the Israelites for a time, and then they will fall back into their old ways.
 
I identify with the Israelites as they seemingly take one step forward and two steps back. I recognize much of my life in the days they spend looking for God’s will for their lives. I see myself wandering in and out of faithfulness, questioning my destiny, desiring my own control.
 
God, however, never leaves me in my despair. Regardless of my stability (or lack of), I am loved just as the children of Israel. I always hear God calling me back to the truth and reminding me that I am rescued, protected… and precious. That’s a new reality I welcome.
 
One step forward,
Pastor Beth

​Anyone who knows me well knows that math is not my best skill. Oh, I can add and subtract just fine. I balanced my checkbook to the penny in January… 1997. I’m pretty sure I could do it again, if necessary. My multiplying and dividing skills are usually pretty good. I know this to be true because I’m especially talented at increasing pancake recipes. I can even do some fractions in my head, and I’m fair with percentages. 35% off? No problem. Formulas are trickier even though I use to love algebra in school. (Trigonometry is a story for another time.)
 
As an English major, I never considered that math would be particularly important to my career path. When I became a pastor, I still didn’t expect numbers to be a major part of my work. I was wrong. I understand the concept of a budget and the value in projections. However, I am not always the best at Excel spreadsheets and all the formulas they require. I can usually figure it out, but it takes me a little longer than someone with a head for numbers.
 
As I sit at my desk and go over figures, I’m often sidetracked by the patterns I see. To be fair, when working with numbers I’m easily diverted. Just about anything is a welcome distraction, but this is different. I don’t mean the numbers appear as shapes and designs. I just find the arrangements and configurations are often related to one another. If I change one number in one column, four others numbers might head in new directions. So many values are dependent on others.
 
Formulas, I’ve learned, are not restricted to spreadsheets and math problems. The Bible is filled with information where values are dependent on others. As Moses approached a bush blazing yet not burned up, he was given the formula for delivering the Israelite people out of suffering in Egypt. God sent him to Pharaoh to bring the people back to Canaan – a promised land of milk and honey – but for Moses, nothing was adding up. He worked to project the outcome, but the problem was too hard. To his thinking, the solution was too evasive. This was not supposed to be part of his career path.
 
Almighty God, always the great teacher, is never one to give up on a student. Moses just needed a little more time to do the math and realize this was a balanced plan. God said to Moses, “I will be with you. And this will be the sign to you that it is I who have sent you: When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you will worship God on this mountain.” (Exodus 3:12, NRSV)
 
From these instructions, I believe the formula is pretty straightforward. God promises; we listen. God sends; we obey. God blesses; we worship. And through it all, God loves. Even when I don’t understand the equation or I get the wrong answers on my own, the final solution, the common denominator, the sum total, is always the same: God loves.
 
Faithfully ciphering,
Pastor Beth

This morning, I was thinking about all the things that are important to my faith journey. Bible study and prayer top the list, of course. Developing routines like study, relationship building, journaling, service; practicing attributes such as humility, empathy, love – all are central to my spiritual growth. Following Wesley’s three simple rules are critical: Do no harm; do good; stay in love with God. Also necessary is taking care of my physical health, my mental health, my emotional health. I need to embrace forgiveness, rocks, contemplation, music and compassion. Each one is essential in my… wait… what? Rocks?
 
I surprised myself with that one. Rocks? Really? Where did that come from, and what does that even mean? Rocks are important to my faith journey? I grabbed my Bible and began to search. Clearly that was a stray thought that only means I need more sleep; but as I walked through story after story, I began to see a solid theme of base strength.
 

• In the hands of a young shepherd with a slingshot, rocks overcome giant troubles. (David)
• In the hands of the misinformed, stones martyr a saint. (Stephen)
• God’s Church is built on a solid Rock. (Peter)
• A wise man builds on rock. (says Jesus)
• The chief cornerstone is rejected. (also Jesus)
• Strike a rock and there will be water for God’s people. (Moses)
• There is a time to scatter rocks. (in Ecclesiastes)
• If people stay quiet, the rocks will cry out in praise! (Jesus again)

 
Throughout Scripture rocks are strong and foundational. Some are placed as memorials and others used as weapons. They help to create altars for worship, and sometimes they are simply discarded. However described, rocks are often instruments ultimately used for glorifying God.
  
"You are indeed my rock and my fortress; for your name's sake lead me and guide me, take me out of the net that is hidden for me, for your are my refuge. Into your hand I commit my spirit; you have redeemed me, O Lord, Faithful God." (Psalm 31:3-5, NRSV) While Psalm 31 includes cries against opposition and wails for deliverance from enemies, the psalmist certainly settles into a claim of hope in his steady and substantial Provider and Protector. The hymn includes passionate declarations of faith as God is proclaimed Shelter and Sanctuary.

Through the years, people have brought me rocks from all over the world. “I’m travelling on vacation; what could I bring you as a souvenir?” My typical answer is: “Just bring me a rock.” I think rocks are a great gift. You can find them anywhere you look, they don’t cost anything except the effort to seek them out, and I’m often surprised by their beauty and strength. Rocks are strong enough to provide protection when you use them to build. If you misuse them, people can be devastated. Yet if you spend enough time understanding their makeup and enough effort and care discerning the splendor they may offer, you are bound to see them shine. Now that I think about it, those are the same things that draw me to Jesus.
 
Thank you God for being rock solid. Lead me, guide me, and help me to continue being a witness for you so that the actual rocks never have to praise you. Amen.
 
Building on rock,
Pastor Beth

While several of my friends are truly enjoying this time of social distancing and staying at home, others are finding themselves frustrated these days. I have several reasons why I fall into that second group.
 
First, most of my resources are in my church office, and I’m constantly needing information that, at least for now, is no longer at my fingertips. Second, I have no idea how to proceed with much of my work. I prefer to be a planner, but the future is uncertain and the data changes daily. Expectations only last long enough for me to begin one course of action before those outlooks change and my track is altered. Most days I’m kind of lost. Hence, the frustration. When I was young and thought about what I wanted to be when I grew up, I don’t think lost and frustrated made the list. I may not have been certain of my career path, but I feel like accomplished and important may have crossed my mind.
 
Recently I had a conversation with someone who was working with me to accomplish some important goals. Quickly I became painfully aware that my lack of knowledge was going to hinder our progress. To make matters worse, many people were depending on our achievements for their own well-being. Rather than slow us down (and potentially create some devastating results), I simply owned it. “At this point, I’m officially in over my head,” I said. “This is not what I know how to do.” I braced myself for a response.
 
I was talking to a very busy and important man whose life is filled with his own set of difficulties. My challenges would have to be lower on his priority list. He had every right to send me packing altogether. Was he going to be too busy in his own work and unable to put in the time needed? Totally understandable. Was I going to be left to figure it out? Totally terrifying. Would he at least be able to recommend someone else who could help me? Please Jesus.
 
His answer came very quickly: “I don’t mind doing this at all. Why don’t you just let me handle it?” Tears of thankfulness and relief welled and threatened to spill onto my keyboard. Jesus had heard my cry and provided me with this precious soul and his servant’s heart.
 
“Whoever wants to be great among you will be your servant. Whoever wants to be first among you will be your slave – just as the Human One didn’t come to be served but rather to serve and to give his life to liberate many people.” (Matthew 20:26-28, CEB) Scripture tells us that we are created to care for others, and Jesus explains that the gift of example is powerful. Just as Jesus gave of himself, my colleague (no, my friend) showed a willingness to be a role model worth imitating. He could easily have been too important, too busy, too uninterested. Instead, his humility kicked into high gear, and he worked hard in a way that benefited our church and glorified our God. Truthfully, people’s very lives were changed because this one man chose to follow Jesus and be a servant to others.

Yep, now I know what I want to be when I grow up.
 
In Christ’s service,
Pastor Beth

​A friend recently showed up at my house with a couple of surprises. First, she was dropping off some homemade pepper jelly. Mmmm… I could just taste the cream cheese and crackers that were waiting to go with that. My mind wandered for a moment as I contemplated whether or not I would tell the rest of the family that this gift was nearby. Oh, of course, I’ll share. My potential for selfishness disappeared, and I snapped right back to reality when my eyes focused on her second surprise. In the car with her, loving the ride with the top down on a sunny day, was her four-month-old Labrador puppy. 
 
Such energy, such enthusiasm, such… body weight! The puppy immediately caught sight our lab and landed squarely on top of my friend as he tried to break free from her grasp and leap from the car. The goal was clear. My friend and I could social distance if we wanted, but for the dogs, it was playtime! As I lifted the pup out of the car and introduced him to his new best friend who was already wagging and panting, my friend untangled herself from his leash, let him loose, and they were off – two of the happiest dogs you can imagine. Jumping and running wild, playing and tackling one another, it was as if they were long lost friends reunited with unspeakable joy.
 
The best part of the next thirty minutes was watching the two water dogs head for our backyard creek. Belly-deep in water, they ran and splashed, chasing one another chaotically, tongues hanging, tails held high, and having a marvelous time.
 
Several times they nearly bowled me over. One hundred and thirty pounds of dog running full steam ahead without thinking or paying attention is about more than my knees can overcome. Other times, they would blast by us so quickly they would be out of sight before I could react. Occasionally, when one or the other would neglect reasonable boundaries, we would call our pets to return to us. I have to say, our three-year-old is somewhat less rambunctious than the four-month-old and came back to me every single time I called. The younger dog, understandably, needed a bit more encouragement. He’s certainly a sweet dog, but he’s young, immature and easily distracted. Several times, I sent our dog to “go get him, bring him back” which was immediately minded. I was quite proud of his good and balanced attitude; he only wanted to obey my will.
 
There are days when my Christian walk gets rambunctious – days when I am running full speed ahead without thinking. Other days blast by nearly knocking me over, and my spirit needs a bit more encouragement. As much as I want to be good and balanced, I tend to resemble the younger dog. Immature in my faith and easily distracted, I might neglect reasonable boundaries and run wild, splashing through deadlines and chasing chaos. If I listen, I always hear God calling me back and expecting me to do his will. If I slow down enough and pay attention, I may even hear God sending me to help someone else make better decisions. “Go get him, bring him back.”
 
As my friend loaded up her puppy and backed her car out of my driveway, I picked up my jelly jar. The dog and I headed to the house, both content in our afternoon. I smiled to myself thinking of how I’d been reminded to be a good friend and realized that the unexpected visit was the best surprise of all. Now I could return to my work refreshed, peaceful and feeling a little more complete. I knew God had provided me with a special blessing today, and I was more determined than ever to dedicate myself to following God’s will.
 
“Now may the God of peace… make you complete in everything good so that you may do his will….”  (Hebrews 13:20-21, NRSV) What a perfect benediction to a wonderful afternoon. Thanks, God!
 
Determined to listen,
Pastor Beth
 
 
 

​Yesterday, a friend asked me if I had heard the latest conversations surrounding worship practices. I had not. After he described the discussions he had heard, I took to the internet to check it out for myself. It didn’t take long for me to find the news reports.
 
I read about places in California and Tennessee (as well as Canada, Germany and others), who are beginning to allow church goers to worship together. How wonderful! I am really looking forward to the day North Carolina lifts our worship restrictions. I am very thankful we have electronic options for now, but to worship together in person will be such a gift! To learn that places around the world were opening ways to glorify God filled me with a sense of hope that, frankly, I’ve been missing lately.
 
Tragically, my hopefulness was short-lived.  As I continued reading, the next statement was exactly what my friend had heard. My heart skipped a beat, and deep in the pit of my stomach was a dreadful ache.
 
There will be no singing.
 
I had to read the article three different times. Then I Googled again and read another article, and then another. Each one reiterated my first read. There will be no singing in churches. Singing, shouting and loud talking are thought to spread the virus as much as coughing and sneezing. With that understanding, governments all over the world are considering such bans.
 
I have always known that music touches my heart, stirs my emotions, and lifts my spirit, but singing is much more. Singing is the method I most often use when worshiping my Savior. I sing when I pray, when I study, when I commune. Singing is a huge part of my worship experience – not just inwardly and not just for me. Corporate singing is how I witness among my church family. Communal hymns are my outward expression of holy love for Jesus Christ. How could I possibly refrain from singing?
 
“Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come into his presence with singing.” (Psalm 100:1-2, NRSV) The psalmist’s hymn calls to my spirit. Come into the presence of Almighty God… with singing. Worship with gladness… and singing. All the earth make joyful noise… and sing!
 
As I contemplated what this could mean for the worldwide worship of God (and, I admit, as I fumed a bit), it suddenly occurred to me that singing doesn’t have to mean “vocal.” I found no evidence that a ban on church singing will take place in North Carolina, but should something like that ever be imposed here I know two things are certain:

1. The worship of God will always continue.
2. My heart will sing.

 
My heart will sing! God isn’t limited by physical sound (or anything else for that matter). I may not like it best, but God will hear my heart sing just as loudly as if my voice carried for miles. In the best interest of community health, I may be asked to refrain from singing in church for a time. I don’t know if that will happen, but even if it does the great music of the Church will never truly be silenced. I know this to be true because Jesus said if God’s people are silent, the rocks will cry out. (Go read Luke 19.)
 
I think we can safely interpret that to mean this: If we stop singing praises to God altogether, God will organize a rock concert beyond imagination. I love that! God always makes a way even when I don’t see it at first. Thank you, Jesus, for the songs of my heart!
 
Always singing,
Pastor Beth

At our house, we have a lot of fun discussing things that we can never prove. Dinner conversations could easily include topics such as Bigfoot or the Loch Ness monster. It’s all in fun, and conspiracy theories make for the liveliest of banter.
 
One of the things I like most about these entertaining topics is that they require you to know what you DO believe in order to dispute the theories of someone else. If I have no truth in my repertoire, I cannot debate your concepts.
 
Never is this more apparent than when one of us turns on late night television and pauses on an alien show. I’m often surprised at how the theories are so similar to my Christian understandings. The history and teachings align so tightly that being drawn in is easily achieved. Many evenings I begin to nod in agreement with the direction the presenter is taking when a hard turn away from reality catches me off guard. Yikes – they almost had me there. If I didn’t have better information already in my arsenal, I might have been disarmed and sucked into a whole new set of ideas. At the very least, I might have questioned my own beliefs. Good thing I know, without doubt, that God is the creator of the universe. Otherwise, I might just wonder about all kinds of interactions through weird and confusing possibilities.
 
While TV shows and alien plots are, again, just for fun, the process of neutralizing my belief system is a real and constant threat. No, that’s not a conspiracy theory in itself; it’s just the way evil works. Evil rarely approaches head-on and full speed ahead. Instead, a little seed of doubt is planted here and a bit of misinformation is given there until the resulting chaos derails my faith. The deconstruction of truth rarely happens with an explosion. More often, a slow chipping away of values is more effective and does more harm.

According to Jesus, damage is done by the one who sneaks in by deceitful means. "Very truly, I tell you, anyone who does not enter the sheepfold by the gate but climbs in by another way is a thief and a bandit. The one who enters by the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep hear his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes ahead of them, and the sheep follow him because they know his voice." (John 10:1-4, CEB) 
 
The sheep (that’s us) follow him (that’s Jesus) because they know his voice (that’s truth). We follow Jesus because we recognize Truth. Bad information is ineffective if I know scripture. Seeds of doubt will be alien to me and cannot grow where my soul has been nourished by the stories of prophets and kings, disciples and witnesses. I cannot be led astray when I know the familiar voice of Love.
 
On this holiest day of the week, I pray I spend enough time with the Shepherd that I hear my name called, and I follow his voice.
 
Listening for Truth,
Pastor Beth

"Oh, what a beautiful mornin'. Oh, what a beautiful day. I've got a beautiful feeling; everything's going my way!"

When I wake up to radiant sunshine on a cloudless day like this one, I find it difficult to keep from breaking into song - especially that one. Rodgers and Hammerstein hit it out of the park with their hit musical Oklahoma, and I love every minute of that film. I am drawn into the sentiments of the characters with all their highs and lows. With glorious music aiding the movement of the story, I find myself captivated by the tension between farmers and ranchers, suitors and darlings, love and fear. Even the dance sequences seem to rage with conflict between styles from square dance to ballet.

Struggles, of course, are not limited to the big screen. Lately, I feel a bit unbalanced and conflicted myself, having more questions than answers. How am I expected to approach another day of solitude when all I want is to go visit someone? My hands were meant to greet others, not type on a computer for days at a time. Am I supposed to accept that a Zoom meeting is a proper substitute for a hug? What am I going to say in a sermon this week? I am still immersing myself in books and study, but my teaching style is driven by the input of others. When the majority of input I receive these days is from the media... well, let's just say my personal ballet is feeling a bit like a barn dance. I feel scattered, overtaken by clouds and darkness. 

However, just when I begin to feel overwhelmed by the pressure and the emotional conflicts, I wake up to a beautiful morning like this one. With God's voice booming promises of love and support, I'm back to breaking into song.

"The Lord God proclaims: I myself will search for my flock and seek them out. As a shepherd seeks out the flock when some in the flock have been scattered, so will I seek out my flock. I will rescue them from all the places where they were scattered during the time of clouds and thick darkness." (Ezekiel 34:11-12, CEB) The prophet beautifully assures me of God's active pursuit of my peace and comfort. "I myself will search, will seek, will rescue." 

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